Dealing with guilt and the Inner Critic
This is something I hear regularly from clients - that they feel guilty about resting, or that they see themselves as being less-than when they can't do all the things that their friends do.
Very often these are people who pushed themselves so hard that in the end they burned out. But it also includes people (usually women) who find it difficult to say "No."
Obviously in the West there is a culture of competitiveness, the work ethic and measuring our worth according to how much we do and how much we earn. And for many of us (myself included) this may be reinforced by not having been given unconditional love as a child: the impression was that we were most loved when we achieved excellence.
These implicit messages carry over into adult life and we may not become conscious of them until we really start to explore that feeling of not being good enough. This often manifests as the Inner Critic - the voice in your head which tells you you could have done better, that you need to put more time in on a project, that you're being lazy if you stop and take a break.
Getting to grips with the Inner Critic can be quite a challenge, but it's not impossible. There's more on the Inner Critic in my blog. And there is also an article on perfectionism.
If you feel that you need support with issues like these, then get in touch. My course of six coaching sessions, Burnout Breakthrough for people with ME/CFS and long covid could help you to unravel some of the psychological drivers which get in the way of your recovery.
Very often these are people who pushed themselves so hard that in the end they burned out. But it also includes people (usually women) who find it difficult to say "No."
Obviously in the West there is a culture of competitiveness, the work ethic and measuring our worth according to how much we do and how much we earn. And for many of us (myself included) this may be reinforced by not having been given unconditional love as a child: the impression was that we were most loved when we achieved excellence.
These implicit messages carry over into adult life and we may not become conscious of them until we really start to explore that feeling of not being good enough. This often manifests as the Inner Critic - the voice in your head which tells you you could have done better, that you need to put more time in on a project, that you're being lazy if you stop and take a break.
Getting to grips with the Inner Critic can be quite a challenge, but it's not impossible. There's more on the Inner Critic in my blog. And there is also an article on perfectionism.
If you feel that you need support with issues like these, then get in touch. My course of six coaching sessions, Burnout Breakthrough for people with ME/CFS and long covid could help you to unravel some of the psychological drivers which get in the way of your recovery.